Flirt, Sidle, Flirt
by Myx Nyx
Summary: Hmm. Sara and Catherine come off an 'incident' with very different ideas about what is going on. Catherine's excited about a new friendship. Sara wants a whole lot more. What will happen next?
1. Chapter 1

01/15/2012

**A/N: Hey guys! Me again! So I was watching CSIBarbie's (so blame/thank her for this newest post) fanvids which led me to watch every Cara fanvid on YouTube, which got me inspired to write this little thing! This first chapter alternates POV a couple of times, but the next chapter will be in third person. This chap just sets the stage for the next bit. Its not going to be super long, but I hope it will provide some amusement.**

**Summary? Sara and Catherine cross signals. We'll see what happens.**

**GO!**

**Cath's POV**

It started out innocently enough. Sara and I had been on a case together. And she was in a pretty good mood- unusually good for Sara. Smiling. _Laughing._ We were having fun. The scene happened to be at an old hangout of mine, and the bartender-cum-owner recognized me. Called me 'Red,' like he used to. I didn't correct him because, well, it was nice to know I wasn't so old that this place had changed that much. And it was nice to know I still looked enough like my younger self to be recognized. Sara had been in the back processing and I hadn't even known she'd heard him until a few hours later.

We were in the break room sucking down some caffeine and talking over the evidence. She was still in a great mood, but I wasn't about to ask why and wreck it, so I just enjoyed it while I could. Nick and Gil were in the room too, pretty much doing the same thing. We were looking at a couple files and decided to follow up on a lead. I told Sara to 'hop to it' and she joke saluted me. "Yes, ma'am!"

And that's when it happened. The first time it happened. She slapped the file shut and I turned back toward the coffee machine. Suddenly I felt the firm smack of a file folder hitting me. Directly on my _ass_. I think I jumped about a foot in the air, not to mention dripped a few drops of coffee down my front. What the fuck?

"Catch ya later, Red." It was definitely Sara's voice. And when I turned around, mouth gaping and eyes bugging out of my head, it was definitely _Sara's_ ass sauntering out of the room. _Uh…hold the phone…_Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Gil looking over his glasses and between me and the door. Nick's jaw was on the floor. Had that just happened? The events of the next few weeks proved that oh, yes it definitely had. And it was just the beginning.

**Sara's POV**

I don't know what I was thinking when I did it. I guess I wasn't thinking and that's pretty much the point. The day had just been going so great. I'd won the lottery. Not kidding. My brother sends me scratch tickets every year on my birthday which had been the week before. I'd finally gotten around to scratching them that morning and, so dead serious, I won twelve hundred bucks! That's my rent and then some! Awesome thing #1.

Awesome thing #2? My ex came around and picked up some stuff she'd left at my place. Now normally, this would not be awesome, but in this instance, it really was. Cassie is a great girl, and we didn't work out more or less entirely because of me. I'm the absentee girlfriend. I'm never around, I'm always at work, and when I'm not at work, I'm always way too tired to do anything but eat and sleep. Maybe watch a movie. So she wasn't really my girlfriend as much as she was the cute chick who came by to water my house plants and feed my cat when I was too busy. With the occasional roll in the hay. In any case, she'd left a sweatshirt and some sneakers and stuff around and she came by to get them. And I apologized again for being utterly crap at relationships. And because she's so fantastic, she just sort of waved me off and told me that I was a great person and I deserved happiness and someday soon, I was going to find it.

Maybe it was because I was already in a good mood; I was well slept and fed and oh yeah, I'd won the lottery! Not to mention just closed a very hard case. So I was feeling pretty good when she said that and for some reason, I sort of believed her. She wasn't the one for me, but maybe there was someone out there who was. She kissed me sweetly and left and I headed into work in a really killer mood. Even getting paired with Catherine for the night could not bring me down. In fact, we were getting along great. Until the thing. The thing that I did. Things were going so well and, I don't know, smacking her ass with the file folder really didn't seem all that weird in the moment.

Of course, by the time I'd turned the corner, I realized what a horribly stupid move it had been and was completely mortified. Six years. We'd worked together for six years and nothing like that had ever happened before. That was just not what we did. Crap. She was going to be so pissed off. Not only had I just undermined her authority as my superior, I had just sexually harassed her in the workplace. In front of Grissom. Shit. Shit, crap, damn! My mind raced as I tried to get through the rest of shift without seeming like a complete lunatic. And without seeing Catherine. She was going to kill me. I spent the next several hours hiding in an abandoned lab working on the case and waiting for her to track me down and end my life in some very unpleasant way.

She never came.

**Cath's POV**

The way I saw it, I had two options. The first was that I could freak and call Sara out on the ass smacking incident. But I knew how well that would go over. Sara would immediately go defensive and freeze up and become a Grade A bitch that would make cases impossible for weeks to come. And as fun as that sounded, it wasn't really the road I wanted to go down with her. Most of the time, I really actually kind of liked Sara. We were very different people with different experiences and methods in our work, but overall, Sara was a decent sort of person. She was smart, resourceful, kind of darkly funny, and sometimes she could be very sweet and thoughtful. Of course, sometimes she could be a total ass. And apparently, sometimes she just up and decided to grab, okay smack, other people's asses. But, for the most part, she was alright. We got along, usually, and I wasn't going to throw another wrench in the relationship we had spent the last six years building.

So that left me with option two. Ignore it. Don't call her on it. After all, if she were one of my friends from outside work (not that there were many still hanging on at this point) or my sister, I wouldn't bat an eye. Friends have that kind of _friendly_ interaction all the time. Huh. Maybe Sara was just starting to think of me as more of a friend. After all, if she felt comfortable enough to just up and smack my ass with a folder and not think it was completely weird, then maybe this was just a natural progression of our friendship. That could be good. It would be nice to have a gal pal around the office. Not competing for cases or Gil's good graces, just…being friends.

I thought back to when I'd first met Sara. True, I was a bit…unwelcoming, but she was investigating Warrick and Holly had just died, was I supposed to throw a 'Welcome to the Team' potluck? No. So I didn't. But I remember making those prank phone calls with her and catching Holly's killer, and I remember thinking that, okay yeah, she was a hardass, but at least she wasn't some simpering girly or some conniving slut. And after Warrick was cleared and she decided to stay, I remember thinking that she had just been doing her job and maybe now that things were okay, maybe we could be friends. Good friends.

Six years later, though, it had just never happened. Sara was prickly and hard to get close to. And I tend not to waste time with people who don't immediately seem like they are willing to put the same amount of time and energy into making a friendship work as I am. But now…friends. With Sara. Hmm.

If one of the boys had had the balls to do what Sara had done, I would have had to say something. Because not saying something, in their pervy little brains, is more or less like saying you wanted them to do it again. And things could get weird or out of hand. But Sara was a woman. She wasn't about to turn it into something it wasn't. More likely, not saying anything would send the message that I felt comfortable joking around with her and being playful. Well…that was pretty much the message I wanted to send so…great. That was settled. Friends with Sara. It would be interesting, to say the least.

**Sara's POV**

So I waited for Catherine to go Ice Queen over the folder smacking incident, but she didn't. I avoided her all shift and then had minimal interactions with her for two days and she never blew up at me. Odd…

It was almost like she hadn't noticed. Like she didn't even care. Weird. The whole thing started to take up way too much space in my brain. Why wasn't she mad? Why wouldn't she care? Because I knew Catherine well enough to know that if she was even slightly bothered by it, she would flip a shit. But nothing. She was not afraid to speak her mind. She would have no problem calling me out in front of the entire lab. If it had bothered her. But apparently…it hadn't. That really bugged me. I just could not understand. What was going on here?

For two days, I could not let it go. It was the only thing on my mind except work. I would wake up in the evenings (after reliving THAT day over and over again in my dreams) and just stare at my ceiling, trying to figure it out. Thinking of Catherine while in my bed was not a new thing. For the first couple of years I lived in Vegas, she was a main character in more than one fantasy. And even when I had convinced myself I was in love with Grissom, she was never that far from my thoughts. In fact, it was only in this last year or two that I had successfully washed either of my supervisors from my head and my heart. It was a waste of time. On both fronts. I was only succeeding in making myself completely miserable.

But now, with recent events taken into account, thoughts of an impure nature just sort of…slipped in. And it was two days after the 'incident', while I was…taking care of the situation, that an idea suddenly occurred to me. The idea in itself was good enough to bring me to climax pretty rapidly. Which gave me time to stare up at the ceiling and think.

Could Catherine…like me? Was that possible?

Most of my head was screaming 'no!' But something was niggling at me. If Catherine had been at all bothered by what I had done, she would not have hesitated to chew me out. Everything I did bothered Catherine. I was pretty sure it would piss her off that we shared oxygen if she had to think about it too closely. But she wasn't upset about the ass-folder thing. It followed that there was a possibility that she was the _opposite_ of upset about it. That, maybe, she didn't mind a bit. That it was a welcome change. Logically, it would also follow that she didn't mind that it was me that did it. So Catherine didn't mind that Sara Sidle smacked her ass in front of the boss? Well, yeah, that was strange. But…could be good. It could be a good thing. Maybe, seeing as she didn't mind the first time, she wouldn't mind if I did it again. Or something similar. It occurred to me that the conversation we had been having that whole shift could be construed as flirting if you were paying attention. So she probably just thought I was flirting and then didn't say anything. Because she liked it. Hmm.

Well, Catherine had the night off tonight. But come tomorrow shift? I was taking this theory out for a test drive.

**End Side A.**

**So? What do you think? What's going to happen next! Do you want the second part? Review, my pretties, review! And I'll see what I can do!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey everybody, look at me! Two updates in two weeks! I am on fire! For those of you who haven't read my last update, it was the latest chapter on Reunions & Revelations, and you should scamper off and read it as soon as you're done reading (and reviewing!) here!**

**Major shout out and thanks must be given to kwmadhouse7, who totally walked me through this chapter, whether she knows it or not! And of course a round of applause for everybody who reviewed the first chapter. Thanks, guys!**

**Now…read on!**

**-S-and-C-**

Sara Sidle had a problem. Deciding to flirt with Catherine Willows while in the safety of one's own apartment, without the flesh and blood woman standing right there in front of you was one thing. In theory, it was a pretty great plan- hard to fuck up. But now that the moment was upon her, Sara was very much at a loss. _How could I forget that I don't know how to flirt on purpose?_

She had been sitting in the break room, waiting for shift to officially start, when Catherine strode in. Looking fantastic. _Of course she looks fantastic, she _always_ looks fantastic._ Tonight, though, she seemed to look especially good. Midnight blue slacks and a peacock blue raw silk blouse over a black camisole with lace along the neckline. Her hair was angelic, her makeup flawless, and her walk was all confidence.

Sara looked down at her own outfit. She didn't look _bad_. Long-sleeved black jersey top (top two buttons undone) over charcoal grey work pants and shiny black boots. Everything hung off her figure the way she liked and she'd definitely worn worse to the lab. But she didn't look quite like…_that. _

The brunette sighed as she watched the other woman prepare her first cup of the day, seemingly unaware that she had an audience. It wasn't fair. Why did she have to be so damn unapproachable and _hot_? Why did she have to be standing in the exact same place she had been when the ass smacking thing had happened? _Great. Now I'm staring at her ass._

Suddenly, the vision _spoke, _"Have fun without me yesterday, Sara?"

Sara jumped. "What? No! I mean, what?" _Smooth, Sidle._

Catherine turned, twirling the spoon in her coffee. She was grinning vibrantly. "Get any good cases last night?"

Work. Okay. Sara could talk about work. "Mm…not really. Nicky and I pulled a B&E, pretty open-shut. I heard Warrick got a naked bank heist, though. Apparently the guy thought he'd leave less evidence if he robbed in the buff or something."

Catherine laughed, "Yeah, I saw the security cam footage on the news. Apparently he had a pretty defining _characteristic_ south of the border?"

Sara's smile came easily enough and she forgot to be nervous. "The way I heard it, he was pretty eager to show the entire PD his manhood, or-"

"Lack there of!" They both said it at once and shared a chuckle. Catherine gestured to the brunette's coffee cup with her chin, "Refill before assignments?"

Sara rolled her eyes and nodded, trading places with the other woman, "Only my third cup tonight."

"Nice. Got a case yet?"

"Nope, still waiting for-"

"Me?" Greg smiled as he appeared in the doorway.

"Nope!" But Sara smiled back.

"How about me?" That was Grissom, and he seemed in no mood for games.

Nick and Warrick fell in behind their boss and the team crowded around for assignments. "What's up, Grissom?" Nick inquired.

"Too many cases. Bad night for Las Vegas. Most of us are solo tonight. Greg takes the trick role. Warrick, the B&E off Tropicana. Nick- suspicious circs and possible missing persons out in Seven Hills. I'll be here manning the fort and keeping an eye on the experiment I'm running for Ecklie's court case." He looked up at the two women. "Girls, you closed that case last week in record time, lets see if you can keep it up. DB out in Henderson, Brass is meeting you there. Let's move, people."

The team spread out and the two women headed for the door. Remembering she was on her best behavior, Catherine held back to let Sara go ahead. But the brunette had the same idea and gestured gallantly, "After you…partner."

Catherine smiled and stepped forward. A polite Sara…she could get used to this.

**CSICath&SaraCSI**

_I will not laugh over a dead body, I will not laugh over a dead body._ Sara repeated the mantra over and over in her mind. Why would she not laugh over a dead body? _That's right, because its not funny!_

It was kind of funny, though. Not the body, of course, but the absurdity of the situation. _The guy blew his own ass off with a homemade rocket chair; it's a little funny._ Sara bit her lip and tried to focus on the gravity of the situation. The man was dead. Dead. Died of massive bleeding and internal injuries. No, she couldn't laugh at that.

Catherine came to stand beside her, surveying the damage. "What an asshole."

Sara almost lost it. She _barely_ contained herself. Tears were streaming and she was biting her lip. _Not laughing. Not laughing, not laughing, not laughing!_

Brass appeared on her other side. "Apparently, it was his favorite chair."

Sara bowed her head and coughed, covering her mouth with a fist. Catherine slapped her on the back. "Okay there, Sar?"

The brunette righted herself and cleared her throat, "Fine, I'm fine. Need to change my gloves." She turned back to her kit and missed the smile that passed between the other two.

It wasn't until hours later, when the two women were in the car on the way home, that they allowed themselves to really let loose and laugh until they cried.

"We're terrible! I don't know why we keep laughing. It really isn't all that that funny. I mean, he's dead."

"But that's part of it, don't you think? I mean, if we didn't laugh, we'd cry. You've got to laugh when you can. And we did have to hold it in for nearly three hours."

"God, I nearly peed when you called him an asshole!" That set the two of them off again. It was an almost hysterical laughter.

By the time they were back in the lab examining evidence, though, they were under control again. It was towards the end of shift and Sara was feeling rather proud of herself. They hadn't argued. They'd had _fun_. And while she hadn't exactly overtly flirted with Catherine yet, this new thing they had going was definitely, well, _going_ somewhere. Not to mention that they'd have this case wrapped up by the end of the night! Bonus!

Meanwhile, Catherine, across the hall, was also feeling immensely pleased with herself. She had been a little worried about this whole 'friends with Sara' business, but she had decided to relax and see where it took her- and what a pleasant surprise! Things were going so well! Better than she'd ever imagined, really. If they kept this up, they were liable to be friends in no time.

There was a knock on the door and Catherine looked up. "Sara, hey! I was just thinking about you. Got your report finished?"

Sara flashed the file in her hand. "All typed up and ready to go. You?"

"Printing it out as we speak."

"Hey, I was wondering, do you want to grab some breakfast? After shift?"

Catherine smiled but shook her head, "I promised I'd take Lindsey to school today. I never have time anymore so…" she trailed off, not missing the momentary look of disappointment on Sara's face. "But rain check, okay?"

Sara put on a brave face as she nodded. "Sure, no problem."

"Geez, Sar, two open shut cases in a row; Gil is going to love us!"

That elicited a real smile from the brunette. "I wonder if he'll keep putting us on cases together."

And he did. Not every case, but at least twice a week for the next month. And every time they worked together, they hit one out of the park. They were the dynamic duo- unstoppable. And with every solved case, they learned that much more about each other.

Sara quickly learned that intentionally trying to flirt with Catherine was a recipe for disaster. As soon as she consciously tried to achieve it, her mouth would dry out and her brain would fry. When that happened, things would get unbearably awkward for a moment. But then Catherine would smile like she hadn't noticed and set Sara on her feet again. And that was when anything that could possibly be construed as 'flirting' would happen. It was when she was at ease with herself and the woman next to her, or on the other end of the phone, that Sara could enjoy the conversation and not get caught up in the mechanics of the situation. Most of the time, she forgot to flirt at all and just had a good time.

She also learned that she _liked_ Catherine. Not just as the sexy, if sometimes difficult, co-worker she had always known, but also as the person she was coming to know. And Catherine did cash in on that rain check, before the week was out. They had even gotten together a few times since then, including twice so Sara could teach Lindsey how to play guitar.

And wasn't it a sight? Catherine thought. To see Sara guiding Lindsey's fingers over the frets, laughing and talking all the while? For her part, Catherine was astounded at how _human_ Sara had become to her. How had she not seen this side of her co-worker before? Not only were they now a great team at work, but they were getting along and hanging out after hours too! It was an amazing transformation. Being friends with Sara was turning out better than she could ever have hoped for.

Friends. Yes, they were definitely friends.

Sara scowled into her microscope one evening. Catherine was off that night and she was paired with Greg. Not that it was a bad thing. Sara had needed the shift to think. She did want to be friends with Catherine. But she also wanted more. And she was beginning to think that it was time to take this _friendship_ to the next level.

**-S-and-C-**

**Ta-da! What do you think? Short and sweet and leading on to who knows what! Well, I know what. And if you want to know too, you'd better hit that button and reeeeeeeeview!**


	3. Chapter 3

05/14/2013

**A/N: Surprise! An update! A whole year overdue, but an update! And to show you how truly sorry I am, its really really long! Well, compared to the first two chapters, anyway! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed all of my open fics and sent me messages- you guys are the greatest and really get me through. And a word to the wise? Never give up hope of an update!**

**Also! Major shout out must be given to sidlelove who definitely inspired this whole update, and without whom, you would all just be watching meaningless cat videos on YouTube right now. Everybody thank her and go read and review all her stuff!**

**Without further ado…Chapter 3!**

"Is Sara staying for dinner, Mom?" Lindsey looked up from the guitar to her mother.

Catherine was leaning in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest. She smiled at her daughter. "That's up to Sara, sweetie." She looked to the woman, holding her own guitar. "What do you say, Sar? A little baked ziti before shift?"

"Uh…" Sara glanced at her coworker and felt her chest tighten. Catherine wore a beguiling smile. She returned it with an awkward hesitant smile of her own. "I'd love to, but I've got a couple of errands I have to run tonight before work, and I need a shower and a change of clothes." She winked at the thirteen year-old, "I smell."

Lindsey giggled.

"But we're still on for this weekend, right?"

"Camping! I'm so excited, Sara. I've never been camping."

"Well its high time you start, don't you think?"

Catherine grinned at the pair, thick as thieves. "I bet you guys will have tons of fun."

"Cath, you totally need to come!"

"Bugs and nature and dirt?" Catherine made a face. "No way!"

"Where's your sense of adventure?"

"In my shoe closet!"

Sara rolled her eyes. "There will be sunsets and campfires and hot springs…"

"Come on, Mom! Family bonding time! Its only two days."

"No way, Jose. You can have Sara-Lindsey time and tell me all about it when you get home."

"You know," Sara said thoughtfully, "if we left right after school tomorrow, we could go see the Grand Canyon."

Lindsey's eyes went wide. "Really? I've never been anywhere except Las Vegas and Lake Tahoe! Is it, like, really far away?"

Sara shrugged. "It's a four hour drive. We could spend the weekend there and still get home early enough on Sunday to make sure you get your homework done." Sara looked at Catherine, "If that's alright with you."

Catherine grinned. "I've never been to the Grand Canyon. You guys will have to take lots of pictures!"

"Yes!" Lindsey pumped her fists.

"We can go camping by the Colorado river later in the summer, Linds. That way, you'll be out of school and we can go for longer."

"Cool. How long til I'm out of school, Mom?"

"About three weeks. Should be a nice time to visit the Canyon. Warm, but not swarming with tourists."

"Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon, Sara?"

The brunette nodded, smiling tightly. "Twice. Once when I was eight. My grandfather took me and my older brother- with no air conditioning or radio in the middle of July. And then again after college. My friend and I went on a road trip across the country."

"Did you go to Disney Land?"

Sara grinned. "We drove by, but we didn't go in. Two girls in their early 20s? They think they're too cool for Disney Land."

Lindsey rolled her eyes as if to say, 'No one's too cool for Disney Land.'

Catherine looked at her watch. "Shift's in hour, Sar. You better get going if you're going to get back to your place and shower."

"Damn! I wanted to get dinner and return some DVDs too!"

"We have a shower," said Lindsey. "And dinner."

"And we can drop your movies off on the way to work."

Sara smiled at the twin innocent faces. "Yeah, but you don't have clean clothes for me to wear after I get out of the shower."

Catherine scoffed, "You're not _that_ much bigger than me, Sidle. We'll find something."

"Well…"

"Pleeeease?" Lindsey made a pouty face.

Sara looked from the girl to her mother and her shoulders dropped in surrender. "Ok-ay…"

"Yay!" Lindsey set her guitar down bounced over and hugged her new best friend.

"Ah! Geroff me, geroff me!"

Catherine thought it was the cutest sight. Sara really brought out the best in Lindsey these days, and she knew that her teenage daughter needed all of the positive role models she could get. "Okay, you two. Lindsey, set the table for three people and take the salad and dressing out of the fridge. Sara, upstairs to my shower- towels are in the middle cabinet on the left. I will start looking for clothes you can wear."

Fifteen minutes later, Sara emerged from the bathroom with hair still fluffy from the blow dryer, and the rest of her tinged pink from a warm shower. Catherine was in her closet eliminating items one by one.

"Too small, too small, too ugly, too unprofessional…hey, how do you feel about a pencil skirt?"

Sara had been looking in the mirror. This towel was made for a smaller person. She pulled it down around her thighs, but that just made it lower across her boobs. She grimaced, "Have you ever seen me in a pencil skirt?"

Catherine laughed. "But it'll make your ass look good!"

Sara snorted. "Who will be looking at me ass?"

"How about…everyone with eyes?"

Sara snorted again. "Nooooo, they won't."

Catherine frowned. "Care to tell me why not?"

"You mean besides the fact that no one looks at my ass?"

Catherine rolled her eyes. "Yeah, besides that completely untrue fact!"

"How about because we are still working the Hodgeman case together?"

"So?"

"So that means I will be with you all night and any time you are in the room, people are not looking at my ass. Not Nick's ass, not Greg's ass, and definitely not Grissom'sass. Your ass."

Catherine grinned. "Jealous?"

"What…? No! I am not jealous! They can…look at your ass! Anyone can look at your ass. Its your ass! If you want people just staring at it, I…I do not have a problem with that! At all!"

Cath frowned. "That's not what….I meant, are you jealous because they _aren't_ looking at _your_ ass. But I was teasing. Because of course they are looking at your ass!"

Sara's eyes widened. "Not they're not! They're looking at your ass!"

"Your ass!"

"Yours!"

"Yours!

"Why would they be looking at my ass when they could be looking at yours?"

"You mean your younger, firmer ass? Yeah, why would they look at that when they could look at my tiny behind?"

There was a knock on the open door. "This is the stupidest conversation I've ever heard. And I can hear you downstairs. You're both old, you both have tiny behinds, and if someone was going to look at one of you, they'd probably look at both. It takes two seconds to look at someone's butt." Lindsey rolled her eyes. "Dinner's getting cold." And she turned and went down the stairs.

Catherine thrust a tank top, blouse, and some jeans at Sara and stalked out of the room. "They'd be looking at your ass…" she threw over her shoulder as she left the other woman to change.

Sara shook her head and moved to get dressed. The end result was less than perfect. The blouse was fine, but the tank top rode too high, and showed off more cleavage than she liked. And the jeans were slung just a little bit too low. Between the tank and the jeans, there was a good three inches of midriff showing.

"This is not going to work," she said as she entered the kitchen.

Lindsey craned her neck from the dining table. "Wow, Sara! You look hot!"

Sara quirked an eyebrow at her coworker. "See what I mean?"

Catherine looked over her shoulder from the stove. "Aww, you look good, don't you think? You should dress like that more often. Maybe all your clothes are the wrong size."

"My clothes are the right size for me and these clothes are the right size for you."

"Maybe not. I've never looked that good in that outfit."

"Catherine, I cannot wear this to work!"

"You'll be fine. Just relax. Be confident. No one will notice. Sit down, ziti's ready."

Sara sat, but she continued to argue all through dinner. "When I lean over the table? I'm half naked."

"You'll be fine. We're going to be in the lab all night anyway, sorting through those…stains and boot prints."

"Are the stains made from blood, Mom?"

Catherine smiled tightly. "We won't know until Uncle Greg tests them." She exchanged a look with the brunette. It was getting harder and harder to put a happy face on the job for her child. Not that Lindsey seemed bothered.

Sara shrugged, then scowled. "What if Greg sees me in this outfit? He'll never let me hear the end of it."

"You're acting like I'm asking you to walk in wearing a bikini! Its jeans and shirt. You'll be fine. And we better get moving. Lindsey, clear the table, please."

Lindsey slumped. "Do I have to? I already set the table."

Catherine hid a smile, "Yes, you have to. I cooked, and I'm doing the dishes. And the sooner you clear, the sooner you can go upstairs and get packed for your weekend with Sara."

The little blonde's eyes lit. "Clear clearing the table…" she began to sing to herself as she jumped up and began collecting dishes. Catherine winked at Sara.

"Doing the dishes," was done in about three minutes, considering all Catherine did was throw them in the dishwasher still caked with marinara sauce. Sara's fingers itched to pull them all out down to the very last fork and give them a proper rinse, but she resisted. They were Catherine's dishes; Catherine could wash them any way she wanted to. As they donned their jackets and grabbed their purses (or backpack in Sara's case), Lindsey scrambled down the stairs with a great armful of clothes. "What do I bring? What do I bring?"

Sara grinned at the eager girl. "Two days, two nights. Bring shorts and tops for the days, but also at least one sweater and jacket and bring the warmest pajamas you have- the desert gets cold at night. Socks. Undies. A hat and sunglasses…and some CDs for the car."

Lindsey looked disbelieving. "We can listen to _my_ music?"

Sara saw Catherine waving her off and shaking her head over her daughter's shoulder. "Well…we can listen to your music half the time and my music the other half."

"Awesome."

Catherine moved forward and kissed the top of the blonde's head. "I love you, kiddo. We've got to get moving. Helen will drop Nana off in half an hour or so. If she doesn't show up before you get into bed-"

"Call you right away on your cell and at the office. Don't open the door without knowing who's on the other side. Yeah, Mom, I know the drill."

Sara grinned and also placed a kiss on Lindsey's head. "Goodnight, Linds. See you tomorrow. I'll pick you up straight from school- you remember what my car looks like?"

The girl nodded.

"Alright, sweet dreams, rock star. Practice your frets some more before bed!"

Sara and Catherine waved as they went down the walk. Sara groaned. "Its so hard to just leave her there! How do you do it every night?"

"It was a lot worse when she was a baby. At least now she practically throws me out instead of crying and waving from the window."

Sara gave a sad smile. "Aww. Poor baby."

"Remind me to write a note to her teacher that someone else is picking her from school. You might have to give your ID at the front desk, so be ready to park."

The brunette made a face. "I get why its necessary, but what a pain in the ass! It might as well be customs. "Is this your child?" She said in a mock official tone. "Where are you going with this child? Does this child's parents know you're here?" She snorted. "As if a predator is really going to use the front door and check themselves in at the desk! 'No, this is not my child, I'm kidnapping her and taking her to the Grand Canyon! Do you have a problem with that? Arrest me now!'"

By the end of the little rant, Catherine was laughing out loud. They slowed and stopped so the brunette could throw her DVDs in the return slot. Sara could be so funny when she wanted to. As the younger woman popped back into the care, a thought occurred to her. "Hey, Sara?"

"Hmm?"

"We've been hanging out a lot the last few months and you really seem to like Lindsey…"

"Yeah…of course I do." Sara said, unthinkingly, "She's awesome. Smart, creative, funny- just like her mom." Her brain caught up with her and she went slightly pink.

Catherine didn't notice, she just smiled. "That's great, I'm glad you guys get along so well. I wanted to ask you. Would you mind…? Its just, I really trust her with you and I know you let her have fun without letting her get away with everything. Could I maybe...put you on her school records as an emergency contact?"

Sara looked more than a little surprised. "Really?"

Catherine continued on, a little nervous. "Yeah, its just. My sister and her family moved to Grand Junction in January? And my mother, well, she hasn't had her license taken away yet, but I don't trust her in a car with Lindsey. I used to have friends that could step in but…you know the job. Over the years, they just sort of melted away. I understand if you don't want to, I just thought…"

Sara looked thoughtful. "What does it entail?"

"Not much. Just that if Lindsey's sick or injured and I'm unavailable for some reason, you would be next down on the list to call. Or suspended, I guess. Lets hope that never happens."

"And then I would take her home and take care of her until you got back from wherever?"

"Yeah. Like I said, if its too much…"

"No, I'll do it. No problem."

Catherine looked at her passenger as they pulled into the lab parking lot. "Really?"

"Yeah, sure. I mean, I hope there's never a minute when you can't get to her, but if there is, I'm happy to help."

Catherine's face lit up like a lamp. "That's great!" She whipped off her seat belt and wrapped her arms around the brunette. "Thanks, Sar!" She pulled back quickly and hopped out of the car, saying, "I'll change the paperwork when I drop Linds off in the morning!" She was around the back of the car and opening the lift gate before she realized that Sara wasn't behind her. "Sara?" she called through the car.

"Hmm?" Sara squeaked. It was a good thing Catherine couldn't see her glazed eyes or goofy grin from this angle.

"You comin'?"

Sara blinked. "Yeah." She jumped out of the car. "Yeah, I'm comin'."

They both grabbed their kits and headed for the lab. They chatted through the hallways and down toward the lockers before dropping off their stuff and heading for the break room. By the time they were pouring their first cups of coffee, they had begun chatting about Sara's camping plans with Lindsey.

"What are you going to eat?"

"Whatever we catch." Catherine made a disbelieving expression and Sara cackled. "Your face! You should have seen your face."

Catherine playfully smacked her friend on her arm. "That's so mean! So what are you really going to eat?"

Sara shrugged. "Soup? Mac & Cheese? Take-out? We won't be that far from civilization."

"How big's the tent?"

"Tent?" Warrick strode in quickly followed by Nick and Greg. "You guys are sleeping in a tent?"

Greg waggled his eyebrows lecherously, "Together?"

Nick moved toward the coffee and looked Sara up and down. "Whoa. Looking good, Sara. You been working out?"

Sara rolled her eyes.

Warrick narrowed his. "Hey, isn't that Cath's shirt? And jeans? And didn't I see you ladies come in together?"

Greg grinned wickedly. "Not just the tent, then, huh?"

About to open her mouth to protest, Sara heard Catherine chuckle. "That's right, boys. I had Sara Sidle in my shower this evening!"

The boys laughed.

"And dropping her towel on my bedroom floor!"

Nick and Warrick laughed again, but Greg, looking like Christmas had come early, couldn't contain himself. "What was it LIKE?"

Catherine looked at him and shook her head. "Put your tongue back in your mouth Greg. Sara was over for dinner and didn't have time to run home and change. I let her borrow some of my clothes."

Greg looked so disheartened that Nick tousled his air and patted him on his arm. "C'mon man. Shake it off. Let's go run some anal swabs- you love anal swabs."

"Yeah…okay…"

Warrick winked at the two women. "Poor guy. Can't blame him for dreaming, though, can you?" He toasted them with his coffee and left too.

Still grinning and about to say something, Catherine turned her head toward Sara…and stopped. Whatever she'd been about to say died on her lips. Sara looked…pale. And she was swaying slightly. "Sar? You okay?" She touched her arm.

"What? Yeah. Fine. We should get to work on this Hodgeman thing. We both thought there were two distinct pools of blood, maybe…"

"Whoa, whoa. Hang on a second. What just happened there?"

Sara looked away and exhaled loudly, searching for any explanation. "I just…I told you I was going to get made fun of in your clothes. And what happens? I'm here a whole five minutes and I'm the butt of everyone's joke!" She crossed her arms defensively over her chest.

Catherine tried a smile. "Not you; us. Our lesbian romance was the butt of everyone's joke. Everyone thought you looked hot in those clothes."

"Well, I didn't find 'our lesbian romance' very funny," she said, her voice contemptuous. "And I don't want to look hot at work. I want to look professional. I _want_ to be respected!"

Catherine took a step back, worried. "You are respected. Everyone respects you. Its okay to show a little skin in the office."

"You would know!"

Catherine sucked in a breath. They hadn't had a fight like this in months. She tried to resist the temptation of tearing Sara a new one. "Sara. Back down. This is not you."

The brunette's eyes were cold. "Maybe it is. Maybe you don't know me like you think you do." With that, she stalked out of the room, heading for the sanctuary of a distant lab.

Catherine looked around. Something wasn't right. She'd let Sara cool down, and then she'd go and find her, and they'd talk it out. Sara didn't act like this with her. Not anymore.

An hour later, Sara reluctantly made her way to the staging area for the evidence in the Hodgeman case. She didn't want to face Catherine yet, but she couldn't justify slacking off at her job. Luck was with her. The room was empty. Grimly, she set about examining the stretch of canvas that the body of Traevon Hodgeman had been rolled up in. She worked for a good while, circling different patterns and recording her findings.

"Its ridiculous, isn't it?" Catherine said from the door.

Sara looked up. "What?"

The redhead came forward and tapped the picture of Traevon. "This kid. He was so smart and talented that he managed to pull himself off the streets and out of nothing. Managed to avoid gangs and drugs and a criminal record. Managed to support his mother and sisters and still stay in college…only to be killed by his art teacher? His art teacher?"

Sara nodded. "The world is pretty messed up."

Catherine pulled a stool up next to Sara's and started donning her gloves. "Look. Sara. We are having a fight. I don't know what I've done wrong, but obviously something has upset you. But…please don't take it out on Lindsey, okay? She really needs you and if I have to tell her that you aren't taking her to the Grand Canyon because we had a fight? It'll break her heart. Not to mention she'll be majorly pissed with me. I've already got one person pissed at me, so can you just…still be there for her?"

Sara looked over and nodded quietly.

Catherine breathed a sigh of relief and without thinking, rested her head on Sara's nearby shoulder. "Thank you. Its just. Her dad always did things like that you know? He must have promised her Disney Land a thousand times. She really needs people who follow through."

There was a long moment of silence and then Sara said, "I'll follow through, Catherine. I'll always follow through."

**END OF CHAPTER**

**Well…what did you think? What do you think will happen next. Send ideas my way! But more importantly send reviews! Because you know…oxygen? Who needs it? Water? For sissies! Reviews? Now that's hardcore.**


	4. Chapter 4

Flirt, Sidle, Flirt Chapter 4 06/17/2013

**A/N: Be impressed! Be very impressed! I have updated…AGAIN! I know. I am quite something. And this update is even longer! Ha! Go ahead. Say you love me! **

**But more than love and respect, what I really like is praise. Aka reviews…**

**Also, big thanks again to sidlelove and also a shout out to leigh03 who's stellar message gave me a burst of speed to get this update finished!**

**And without further ado…**

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Sara was, as they say, a mess. It seemed like every area of her life was collapsing- social, personal, professional, you name it, and all because she was an idiot and she knew it. It had been two weeks since she and Lindsey had left for the Grand Canyon, and she still had not stopped fighting with Catherine. Oh, she had kept her promise, she was there for Lindsey whenever possible; going to her softball games, teaching her guitar- scarcely three days went by in a row when she didn't see the little blonde. But 'civil' was the best you could ever describe her interactions with Catherine, and when they were at work? Sara was downright confrontational.

She just…couldn't see how she could be any other way. That night in the lab? When Catherine had joked about their love affair- as if it were completely ridiculous? That had hit a little too close to home for the brunette. Catherine seriously had no idea how she felt, and apparently found the idea of the two of them together totally laughable. Ugh. What was the point of life? She knew she was head over heels for the redhead at this point. What had started as mild infatuation and general curiosity had quickly escalated to desperate pining for the older woman as they had gotten to know each other. And now? Sara was stuck.

She _couldn't_ be relegated to permanent friend duty for the duration of their relationship, but she also knew that anything more was out of the question. The only thing she could think to do was put distance between herself and the other woman. But with her promise to stay in Lindsey's life (which she couldn't break) and the torture of working with Catherine every night (which she couldn't avoid), it was very difficult to put literal distance between them. So she picked fights. She gave stony expressions and cold shoulders. She grumped and sulked and dragged her feet just to be annoying. And it worked.

Catherine gave as good as she got- as good as she always had. Nearly. She fought back, perfected the icy stare, griped and pounced on every opportunity to show Sara up. But sometimes…actually, pretty much always, she was the first to give in. In the past, Catherine had never hesitated to put Sara in her place; to pull rank, push boundaries, and undermine authority. Now though, when the brunette sniped and snapped a little too eagerly, Catherine would back down. She'd get a sad expression in her eyes and look down at the ground.

"Are you still coming to set up Lindsey's webcam tonight?" she'd ask, resignedly. "I can't seem to figure it out."

And Sara would feel like an ass. In fact, Sara felt like an ass pretty much all of the time. Because, case in point; Sara was being an ass. She knew it, Catherine knew it, and Grissom, who had stopped putting them on cases together the week before, also definitely knew it. And what was worse, the brunette was starting to get the feeling that Lindsey knew it. And that was unacceptable. She had no right to take her stupid lovesick broken stomped-on heart out on a sweet kid who just needed people in her life who cared about her.

So back to friend duty it was. If Catherine would have her back as a friend. Despite knowing the heartache and longing she would be subjecting herself to if she took up the platonic torch once more, Sara found herself desperately hoping Catherine would forgive her. It would be an utter relief, at least at first, to cease with the immense chore of having to be constantly defensive with the one person she wanted to be close to. It was ridiculous how much she was looking forward to apologizing when you considered how much she was also dreading it.

But it would have to wait until Tuesday. Sara had only come to this decision an hour ago and by then, Catherine was already on a plane to Seattle for a forensics conference that started on Friday and ran clear through the weekend. It had been scheduled for months, and before their fight two weeks ago, Sara was going to watch Lindsey for those four days. But Monday, Catherine had reneged on their agreement, saying she had gotten her mother and some babysitters to cover it because she had not wanted to 'inconvenience' the brunette. Sara hadn't felt like she'd had much right to argue, given her complete ass hat-ness of late, and had acquiesced without much of a fight. Now she was sitting alone in her apartment in the middle of the day, unable to sleep and utterly appalled with her own behavior. She could only hope that Tuesday would come soon and that it wouldn't be too late.

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

Meanwhile, thirty thousand feet up, Catherine Willows woke from a fitful nap to stare out the window at the cloudless horizon. Her stomach was in tight knots and she knew it had nothing to do with her distance from the ground.

Sara.

It was always Sara these days.

There was no way around it. Sara was being a grade A bitch. And Catherine had no idea why. It had literally been hot to cold in two seconds flat. They'd been the best of friends one minute and the next? Catherine sighed. What annoyed her more than anything was not Sara's behavior, but her own. Sara was clearly having some kind of problem that she didn't want to talk about. And three months ago, Catherine could have ignored it. Three weeks ago, she would have asked what was wrong like a properly concerned friend. But now? She was horribly trapped in the middle. And she did not like feeling trapped. Sometimes, Sara would provoke her and her instant reaction would be to provoke right back.

"_Nice attitude, Catherine. Maybe you could be a little _more_ hostile with that witness."_

"_Kiss my ass, Sara. You can't even be less hostile with people trying to be your friend."_

Or possibly,

"_Just because you're beautiful doesn't mean you can walk all over people and treat them like dirt."_

"_PMS much, Sidle? Just because you're a tight ass doesn't mean I can't look good when I come into work."_

And so on. But other times…other times, she would look at Sara as she said those things and see that the venom didn't quite reach her eyes. And she would lose heart. Being mean to Sara now that she actually _knew_ Sara left a bad taste in her mouth. Clearly, Sara was hurting and this was just her way of lashing out.

On top of Sara, there was Lindsey to think about. Lindsey had attached herself to Sara in such a small amount of time. In retrospect, Catherine realized that she should not have encouraged the relationship so quickly. She had never brought anyone she was dating into her home the way she had ushered Sara in. Especially not someone she knew to be emotionally unpredictable. But Sara wasn't someone she was dating, Sara was a friend, and it had just seemed so natural at the time. And she had never met someone who liked and appreciated and supported Lindsey the way Sara did. Bottom line, she trusted Lindsey with Sara more than she ever had with anyone else- even Eddie. Hell, especially Eddie!

But these last two weeks, she had found herself treating Sara more like her ex-husband than anything else. Bickering in private, but then still figuring out ways to manage the brunette's relationship with Lindsey- making sure they had quality time together and working really hard not to confront Sara on her issues any time Lindsey might be around. It was exhausting. And not something Catherine had ever wanted to do again.

Catherine blinked. Suddenly, she was mad at the other woman. This was complete bullshit! Sara had no right to take whatever it was she was going through out on the Willows family. No matter how hard Catherine worked to keep it out of her house but keep Sara in, Lindsey was thirteen and she was not stupid. Neither mother nor daughter needed the aggravation. When she got back from this conference, she was going to tell Sara she could either grow up and talk about her problems or she could stay out of their lives. It wasn't fair on anyone to keep things going the way they were. Sure, it would upset Lindsey in the short term, but in the long run, it would be better for her to have stability than to have the stress of parents who argued all of the time.

Catherine blinked again. Parents? She shook her head. That was a weird slip.

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

"…_I am the sun…I am the air…"_

Sara jolted awake from her awkward position on the couch, immediately reaching for her phone. God, why had she left the ringtone on so loud? And what time was it?

"Hullo?" she croaked into the mouth piece as she checked her watch. She'd only been asleep for twenty minutes.

"Sara?" came a weak voice.

"Lindsey?"

"Yeah," came the small reply.

Sara sat up. "Are you okay? You don't sound good."

"I threw up."

"Where are you?"

"At school. At the nurse. I have a fever. Can you come pick me up?"

Sara thought very quickly, "Umm, yeah, sweetie, I can. Can you put the nurse on please?"

"Okay."

A moment passed and then, "Mrs. Sidle?"

Sara didn't bother to correct her. "Yeah. Is Lindsey okay?"

There was a smile in the other woman's voice at her concern. "I don't think its too serious. She's thrown up and she has a low grade fever. With a fever though, I'm afraid she needs to come home. Lindsey said her mother was out of town, and we've got you down as her emergency contact."

Really? Sara almost said. Then she remembered. Before their fight, Catherine had said she was going to add Sara in that capacity. And she had still done it? Even though Sara was being nasty?

"Right," she said instead, "Right. Okay. I can be there in fifteen minutes. Could you put Lindsey back on?"

"Of course."

"Sara?"

"Hey, sweetie. I'm going to be there really soon to get you, okay?"

"Okay. I'm sorry, Sara."

"No, don't be sorry kiddo. We'll get you better in no time. Why don't you get all of your stuff together and I'll be as fast as I can?"

"Okay. See you in a little bit."

"You betcha."

Sara hung up, running a hand through her hair. As soon as the line went dead, she was speed dialing Catherine's phone. She knew the other woman would still be in the air, but she wanted to leave her a voicemail anyway, so she had an update as soon as she touched down.

"Hey, Catherine, its Sara. I just got a call from Lindsey's school. She's sick and even though they don't think its too bad, they want me to come and pick her up. I'm heading over there now, I just wanted you to…know. Yeah, so give me a call when you get this and I'll let you know how things are going."

Thirty minutes later, after directions from the nurse to drink plenty of fluids and maybe stick to lighter foods until Linds was feeling better, the woman and the girl buckled up in the car. Lindsey looked positively green, and despite the nurse's insistence that it was a simple 'tummy bug,' Sara was very worried.

"Honey, do you have a key to your house? It might be better to be in your own bed than at my apartment."

Lindsey nodded and closed her eyes. "Uh-hum…"

"Okay. Next stop; home."

Lindsey nodded again, but within seconds of pulling away from the curb, she was asleep.

Sara's thoughts raced for most of the ride. She'd never handled a sick kid before. And this wasn't just any kid. It was Catherine's kid. What would Catherine do? Halfway back to the house, she realized that Lily Flynn would need to be told so that no one else tried to pick Lindsey up from school. Sara looked over at the girl and smiled softly. Despite the circumstances, it was good to be around her again. At least they would get to spend some time together this week after all. When they pulled into the drive, the brunette gently shook the young girl awake.

"Linds? We're home."

The blonde jerked her head suddenly and instantly regretted it. "Sara? I'm gonna be-"

But Sara had seen the expression on her face and known what it meant. Lunging forward, she pushed the girl's door open and angled her head over the pavement. Lindsey was immediately sick, narrowly missing the side of the car. Sara rubbed her back until the bout of heaving subsided. Then she carefully got out of the car and went around to the Lindsey's side. Avoiding the puddle of sick, she unbuckled the girl's seat belt and hoisted her out of the car. Setting her on her feet in the grass, she crouched down to take inventory of the thirteen year-old. She swept hair out of her eyes to see tears on her face.

"Hey, Linds. What's wrong?"

"I hate being sick."

Sara hugged her as tight as she dared. "Me too. I'm a rotten patient too."

"I'm sorry I puked on your car."

Sara glanced over and saw that there was indeed a small amount of vomit on the running board. She shrugged. "No biggie. We can hose it off. At least you didn't puke _in_ my car. Then I'd have to kill you."

Lindsey gave a weak giggle.

Sara smiled. "You gonna be okay?"

The girl nodded.

"Okay, then why don't you-"

"_Put up your dukes, let's get down to it…"_ Sara knew that ringtone.

"Hey, its your mom. Why don't you let yourself in and get a glass of water? I'll wash this mess off and calm your mom down before she freaks out and flies straight back here!"

Lindsey smiled and headed for the door as Sara picked up her phone.

"Catherine?"

"Sara! Thank God! Is she okay? Do you have her? What's wrong?"

"Okay, deep breath! She's okay, I have her, and I think it's the stomach flu."

"She threw up?"

"Yeah. Once at school and then again as soon we got home. But she's okay. She's a tough cookie. She's in good spirits."

"Okay." Catherine finally took that breath. "Okay."

"Cath?" Sara moved toward the side of the house and turned on the hose at the spigot.

"Yeah?"

Sara moved to pick up the hose and start spraying off the driveway. "Don't freak out, okay? But…what do I do?"

Catherine thought for a second, trying to calm herself. "This actually happens fairly often. A few times a year anyway. When she's really stressed out or active. Does she have a fever?"

"She did at school. The nurse took her temperature. Uh…99.9? Does that sound right?"

"Right. Okay. There is a thermometer in my bathroom, Linds will show you how to use it. Check her temp again soon and then every couple of hours after. If it goes above 103, you need to call her doctor. That number is on the fridge. If the doctor can't see her, you need to take her to the hospital, okay? The closest one is Spring Valley on Rainbow Boulevard."

"Hospital?" Sara felt a bit faint herself.

"Yes. But Sara? Just so you know, that's never happened to her with stomach flu."

"Okay." Sara breathed again. "Check her temp. What else?"

"Fluids. Mostly water. She has a pink bottle with a sports top next to her bed so she doesn't knock it over. Ginger ale and tea are okay too. No dairy, no sweets, no rich foods. Stick with crackers until she stops puking for at least three hours and then start her on soups with a broth base-not cream or tomato. She sleeps a lot, and I'd highly recommend sleeping while she sleeps. This is what usually happens; she throws up for the first four to six hours. Then she sleeps and her fever climbs for the next twelve hours. Then it peaks and breaks and it takes her a couple of days to feel one hundred percent. But it's a little different every time, Sara. Use your judgment and talk to her about it. If she has more pain than usual or there's blood in her vomit? Take her to the hospital. If she's still vomiting after eight hours? Hospital. If her fever goes up more than a couple of degrees in an hour?"

"Hospital. Got it. If in doubt; hospital."

"Right. I'm at baggage claim. Do I need to book a flight home?"

By this time, Sara had shouldered both her and Lindsey's packs and walked into the front hall. She found Lindsey there, sipping on a pink water bottle. She smiled and put her hand on the girl's head. "I don't think so. Let me put her on for second."

"Mommy?"

Sara took their things into the living room and then moved to the kitchen to give them privacy. While she was in there, she took inventory of the fridge and pantry and found a good supply of all of the things Catherine had mentioned. Ginger ale, crackers, soup. This must really be a fairly common occurrence for Catherine to be so well stocked. Returning to the front hall, she found Lindsey saying her goodbyes and handing her back the phone.

"Cath?"

"Yeah. So, Linds says she's okay and knows you'll take good care of her. I've told her to try and help you and tell you if anything is out of the ordinary. She doesn't want me to come home, so for now, I'm going to stay. If it becomes too much though, call me straight away, okay?"

"I will. But I think we'll be okay. I should probably call your mom, shouldn't I?"

"I'll do it. I'll tell her what's going on and tell her to call you to work out a schedule for tonight."

"I'll stay with Linds tonight." At the silence on the other end of the line, Sara hurried to say, "if that's okay. I just don't want to leave her." Lindsey gave her a sleepy grin and she ran a hand through the girl's hair in response.

"Yeah. No, that'll be good. Sar…" there was a hesitance in her voice. "This could be our fault. She…this used to happen a lot when Eddie and I would fight. I think this might be how she might be dealing with…our situation, lately. Do you get what I'm saying?"

Sara's heart clenched. She hadn't thought of that. She gave those blue eyes a sad smile. "Yeah. I hear you." She tried to keep her words light and still convey her message to Catherine, "We'll fix it."

"The second I get back, Sara."

"I'll be here," she said firmly. "The second you get back."

Catherine sighed her relief. "Okay. Call me in a few hours with an update. All I have to do this afternoon is check into the hotel and tour the conference space."

"Will do. I'm going to get this kiddo into bed."

"Alright. Umm…take care."

"You too." Sara slipped her phone into her pocket and turned the girl toward the stairs.

Lindsey barely made it to the bathroom at the top of the stairs before she was sick again. After she rinsed her mouth, she picked up the waste paper basket and brought it with her to her bedroom. Sara went for the thermometer while Linds changed into pajamas. When she came back, the girl was in bed, blinking sleepily. They took her temperature and Sara was distressed to find it had risen by half a degree.

"One hundred point four," she reported frowning.

Lindsey nodded, sinking further under the covers and closing her eyes. "That's pretty normal."

"Get some rest, kiddo. And I'll be in your mom's room if you need me, okay?"

"Okay, Sara…g'night…"

"Goodnight." Sara leaned forward and kissed the warm forehead before her. "Sleep tight."

The girl was asleep before Sara turned out the light. It was still only midday, so the sun shined merrily through the windows as she entered Cath's room. Finding the blinds and pulling them down, she found that Catherine had the same light blocking ones that she had on her own windows. The redhead had said to sleep when Lindsey slept, and Sara was feeling pretty tired. She set her phone alarm for two hours and then slipped out of her shoes.

As tired as she was, sleep did not come immediately. She was thinking about what Catherine had said. This used to happen a lot when she and Eddie fought. Sara was wracked with guilt to think she had driven the thirteen year-old to this with her idiotic behavior. It was unforgiveable. She hated herself for it.

Realization struck her. Enough was enough. She reached for her phone and hit redial.

"Sara?"

"Catherine. Here's the thing. I'm in love with you."

"I…what?"

Sara plowed on. "I'm in love with you. You're an amazing, irresistible person and…I'm in love with you and your family. And I want to be with you any way I can. I'll learn to deal with just friends if that's what you want. I'm sorry I was such an ass the last couple weeks. I hate that I upset Lindsey so much. It makes me sick. I just didn't know how to handle it and I'm not used to thinking about how my actions affect other people. But if you'll let me…I'll make it up to you. I'll put you and Lindsey first for…well…ever."

There was a long pause.

"Say anything."

"Sara…" the name came out as a great exhalation.

Catherine's mind was…blown. She was flabbergasted. To say that was the last thing she was expecting when she picked up the phone would be the biggest understatement of the century. She was completely blind sided. Not only by Sara's confession, but by the wave of her own emotions upon hearing it. It was going to take more than a few seconds to sort them all out.

"Sara…" she said again. "I'm not…I mean, I've never been…"

"Gay?"

"Right. That."

"Yeah. I kind of figured."

"But umm…" Catherine's thoughts raced a million miles an hour. The weirdest thought of them all was that she wasn't completely dismissing the idea of being with Sara as soon as it entered her brain. Why wasn't she chucking that idea straight out the window?

It was the longest silence Sara had ever had to endure over the phone and it was making her squirm. "Catherine? I've clearly given you a lot to think about. Why don't I hang up and call you back in few hours with an update about Lindsey? And we don't have to talk about this again until…you get back?"

"Lindsey…right…yeah…" Catherine's thoughts were in a complete haze. "Right…"

"Okay…bye, Cath."

"Mmm-hmm…"

Sara hung up. For a moment, her heart pounded in her ears. Then, she breathed an enormous sigh of relief. And slept.

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**I KNOW! How amazing am I? I mean, the story! How amazing is the story?! You should fully express your views in a REview!**


	5. Chapter 5

11/08/2013

**A/N: Ah! Apologies are of course due, but what could I say that you haven't heard every chapter before this one?**

**Big shout outs to leigh03 and Panda-Cube, whose reviews inspired my lazy ass and without whom you would all still be waiting around pining after my cheesy fluffy words. **

**Note: I forgot to mention last chapter that Sara's general ringtone is **_**How Soon is Now,**_** by The Smiths! And her ringtone for Catherine is **_**Hit Me With Your Best Shot**_** by Pat Benatar. Because, lets face it. Sara is rockin'. **

**Okay guys, this is the big one!**

**IOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOI**

Lindsey sighed as she buckled her seat belt. "Do I really have to go to school today, Sara? It's the last day. Its not like we're going to learn anything. Can't I just stay here and hang out with you?"

Sara smiled over at the teenager as she pulled out of the driveway. "You haven't had a fever in two days, you haven't thrown up since Friday. You are not sick and you are going to school."

The blonde's shoulder's slumped. "C'mon, Sara. All we're going to do is watch movies and stuff."

"And sign yearbooks and say goodbye to your friends for the summer _and _get out of my hair for the first time in four days!"

Lindsey stuck out her lip. "Please?"

Sara shook her head. "Look, kiddo. You know how your mom and I have been having a tough time lately?"

The thirteen year-old rolled her eyes, "You mean how you guys have been having a massive fight and pretending you're not?"

Sara had the good graces to look guilty. "Yeah. That."

"Yeah, I've noticed. I'm not stupid."

"I know you're not. You're brilliant." Sara winked at the girl. Then her face became serious again. "Well, we've agreed that when she gets home in a few hours, we are going to talk it through and figure out what to do."

Lindsey looked elated. "You mean we can go back to the way things used to be?"

Sara hesitated. She didn't want to lie to the girl. "Maybe. We were pretty mad for a while there, Linds. And there are a lot of emotions at stake. I made some mistakes…things…things might change."

Lindsey did not like the sound of that. "Like…you won't hang around anymore?"

Sara drew in a breath and let it out slowly to buy herself some time. She was watching the road as she said, "There is a chance that we won't do as much stuff all three of us together. If your mom and I can't agree…" Sara swallowed hard. "But Lindsey, I will always be here for you."

"What if Mom says we can't ever hang out again?"

"I don't think she will." Hoping she was right, she said, "If your mom didn't want me to be around you at all, she wouldn't have let me take care of you this weekend. There just might be an issue with whether she wants me around her."

"But you still like her, right?"

Sara looked over as she pulled up in front of the school. "Oh, Linds. I love you and your mother so much. Its just…relationships get more complicated when you get older."

Lindsey rolled her eyes again. "That's such a lame excuse, Sara. Mom loves you too. Can't you just promise me that you'll work it out? Whatever it is?"

Sara felt her throat go tight. She leaned forward and kissed the girl on her forehead. "I promise that I will try very, very hard. My very hardest, okay, kiddo?"

Lindsey wiped hurriedly at wet eyes. "Okay."

"Have a good day at school. Summer vacation starts in just a few hours."

"And then we'll have lots of time together, right?"

Sara smiled. "You bet."

Lindsey unbuckled her seatbelt and sprung forward, hugging the woman tightly. "I love you, Sara." And then she hopped out of the car and ran up the sidewalk.

Sara sat very still for a long while after that, overcome. This was going to be harder than she'd thought. In the last couple months she had unknowingly become part of a family and…she'd loved it. Now, what if it was all over? What if she'd blown it? Had she lied to Lindsey? Was there a chance that Catherine would forbid them from hanging out? And what about time with Catherine outside of work? Sara knew that the best she could really hope for was that Catherine would agree to go back to being friends, but what if even that was out of reach? Confessing her love had seemed like a good idea at the time, but so many things do. Only to come back and bite you in the ass.

Still there was some hope. She had talked to Catherine a lot over the weekend. Three or four times a day. And though she had definitely been weird the first few times and had tried to only talk to Lindsey, over time Sara had got her to warm up quite a bit. She just kept talking about Lindsey and how she was doing and casually not mentioning the undying love thing, and by the time Sunday evening rolled around, Catherine was bantering back and almost sounding normal. So maybe things were going to be okay? Their conversation this morning had been a little strained though. Sara had offered to come pick the other woman up at the airport, but Catherine had insisted on taking a cab. She said she just wanted to give the brunette some extra sleep, but Sara was skeptical. Besides, what kind of sleep was she going to get? Did Catherine honestly expect her to get any shuteye at all? Sara's current plan was to lay in bed all morning staring at the ceiling, quaking in her metaphorical boots until she heard the keys turning in the lock.

Getting back to the house though, she realized her plan had to wait. Four days of mess was strewn about the house and definitely needed to be cleaned up. Sighing, Sara set down her pack and got to work.

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

Catherine blinked into the bright sunlight as she walked out of McCarran Airport, dragging her rolling suitcase behind her. Well, she thought, here was a day she'd never seen coming. Walking to the taxi stand, she thought about the last four days. Not the conference. The conference had been a breeze. The conference had been a run of the mill backdrop for the craziness that was taking place in her head. And over her phone.

The second the plane had landed on Thursday, her phone had beeped with a voicemail. Seeing it was from Sara, her first childish instinct was to ignore it. But curiosity won out and a minute later she was glad it did. Lindsey was sick. The panic every mother feels when she is not in control of a crisis involving her child set in and she called Sara immediately. Hearing that it was the stomach flu though, she calmed down a bit. Stomach flu was not new; stomach flu she could handle. Talking to Sara at first, she thought she'd better come home anyway. Even though she knew Sara could handle it if she had to, she clearly had no idea what she was doing. It was talking to Lindsey that had changed her mind.

"Mommy?"

"Hey baby, how you doing?"

"I'm okay. Sara brought me home. I threw up on Sara's car."

"_In_ Sara's car?"

There was a small smile in Lindsey's voice as she said, "No, mostly on the driveway but a little on Sara's car."

"Well that's okay, that can get washed off."

"Yeah, Sara already did that."

"Good. How are you feeling? Do you need me to come home? I can turn around and be back in just a couple of hours."

"No, its okay, Mom. I don't want you to miss your thing in Seattle. Sara's doing a really good job. Besides, I really wanted her to take care of me this weekend anyway. Now she can."

"Lindsey…" Catherine warned, "You aren't pretending to be sick so that Sara would come and get you, are you?"

"No..." Lindsey said sadly, "I just, you know, I miss spending time with her, that's all. Stuff's been different lately."

"Yeah," Catherine hesitated and her heart clenched, "yeah, it has. I'm sorry, Linds. I miss Sara too. Are you sure you're okay? I really can turn right around."

"I'm okay. You should stay. Sara will take care of me."

"I know she will. But you've got to help her out okay? Pay attention to how bad you're feeling. If it gets worse, you have to tell Sara when its not normal, okay?"

"Okay. Sara's coming back now."

"Alright. I love you, baby. I'll talk to you later tonight, I promise."

"Love you too, Mom. Here's Sara."

So she hadn't gone home. She'd stayed away. It had been very clear to her what had happened and it left a twisting knot in her stomach. Her fight with Sara had stressed Lindsey out so much that it had made her sick. She knew the signs. It had happened all the time with Eddie. But one thing was for sure, Lindsey and Sara needed this time together. Lindsey needed Sara to take care of her, and Sara needed to know Lindsey was okay.

Fifteen minutes later, just as she was getting into a cab and feeling much better about the whole situation, her phone had rung again. Sara again. And apparently…she was in love with her? Jesus. No one is ever expecting that phone call.

Getting into a cab again this morning, this time to go home, Catherine's mind was still racing. She had turned down Sara's offer of a ride, saying that she didn't want to interrupt her sleep, but what she really needed was an extra hour to herself to figure this shit out. _I don't know why I think I can solve in an hour what I haven't been able solve in four days._

_Sara confessed her love to me. That is just so…irritating!_ She slammed her head back against the seat, thinking over the deliberations of the last few days. Her initial thoughts had been ones of utter shock. At first, she wasn't even sure she'd heard right. _I mean seriously…WHAT?! _And then, after she'd gotten off the phone, her next thoughts were ones of denial, panic, and more shock. _This cannot be happening. What am I going to do? I mean seriously…WHAT?! _Three days later, she was still totally floored, but she had at least calmed down enough to think about the situation as a nearly rational human being. The first time Sara had called back, a few hours after her little revelation, all she had been able to say was 'mhmm,' 'good,' and 'can you put Lindsey on the phone?' Actually, that was pretty much all she could say for about the first three calls. What was she supposed to say?

But then she had stopped thinking about herself and started listening to Sara on the other end of the line. Sara's voice was easy and calm, and she really only talked about one thing. Lindsey. And it was the way she talked about her that got Catherine's attention.

"She's asleep right now, Cath. I just checked in on her. She's so cute when she sleeps, isn't she? She still looks like a little girl. And she wanted to wear her old Powerpuff Girls pajamas. She says she hasn't worn them in forever, but when you're sick, you really just want to be super comfy, you know? I wanted to wake her up to take her temp again, but you said every hour and its really only been a half hour, so…hey, are you still listening?"

And she was, to every word. Sara cared about Lindsey, it was clear in everything she did when she was around them.

The thing was, Catherine had had people confess their undying love to her before. Drunk bums in the street would do it. Guys looking for a lap dance would do it. Guys in bars. Guys she was dating. The man she'd married. Lots of people. Men. Whatever. 'I love you' was the number one pick up line. The number one plea for attention. The number one apology. People threw it around like it was going out of style. But Sara…

Instinctively, Catherine knew that Sara was different. She doubted Sara had told more than a handful of people in her life that she loved them. And she knew what a private person Sara was. It had probably almost killed her to be so open and up front. And besides, for all of the people that had confessed their love for Catherine, no one had ever thought to include Lindsey in their declaration. Sara had said, 'I'm in love with you and your family.' She had said she would put Catherine _and Lindsey_ first. Forever. That had never happened. Not even Eddie had ever made such a statement. And Catherine knew it was true as soon as she heard it. As much as her brain was telling her that there must have been some kind of mistake, her heart was telling her it must be true. That's why Sara had been so upset. That's why Sara had been so hurt. That's why Sara had fit so perfectly into their family.

With ever other person, Catherine kept her personal life separate from her family life. She hadn't brought home a man to meet Lindsey since Eddie left. She hadn't even really brought friends home. Though the occasional 'girls' night' was all she could really afford time wise, she never brought those people home either. But Sara…Sara had been in her work life and then her personal life, and then it had just been so natural to bring her into her family life.

But Sara…was a woman.

Despite what she had always taught her daughter, that it doesn't matter who you love as long as they make you happy, Catherine had her doubts when it came to herself. She'd never been gay or bisexual or whatever. Sure, she'd kissed a girl or two during her dancing days, in a casual, fun, extra dollars in the g-string kind of way, but that didn't count. There was no emotion in that, and she certainly hadn't been _attracted_ to them. Nor to any woman. Ever. _I mean, I've thought about women. They're beautiful and sexy, but I've never thought about…sex with a woman. A relationship with a woman. _It had honestly just never crossed her mind. Now though, with five miles to her house and a certain waiting brunette…she couldn't seem to get the idea out of her head. Sara was a beautiful woman. Young, but not a child. Fit, but not a stick figure. Deep brown eyes and a killer mega-watt smile. _What's not to like?_ Was this really as crazy as it sounded?

Yes. The answer was obviously yes. She couldn't date a _woman_! She couldn't date _Sara! _That was nuts! She would just have to tell Sara that they would have to stay friends, that's all. How could she even entertain the idea of this? It was Sara. It was crazy!

_And yet…_she sighed.

And yet, it was Sara. Sara, with her quirky sense of humor and her fathomless gaze and her damn insistence on not eating meat. Sara, who was teaching Lindsey to play guitar and promised to take her camping over the summer. _Sara, who always treats me right and respects me. Sara, who always will. _

But still.

It took the cabbie asking if this was the right house for Catherine to realize they'd come to a stop. She was home. She paid the man. She grabbed her suitcase. She started up the walk. When she reached the door, she almost felt as if she should knock. But no, this was her house, her home and she could go straight in. If she wanted to. She knocked.

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

Sara had been sitting at the bottom of the stairs for the past half hour, just waiting. She had cleaned the house until it shined and had gotten no sleep whatsoever. She had run over to her apartment to change her clothes and feed her cat, and then she had run back to Catherine's and cleaned some more. In the back of her mind she realized that she should just lie down and relax; Catherine was going to get there when she got there and no amount of pacing by the door or jittering on the stairs would make her come any faster. Would it look weird if Catherine opened the door and she was just standing there? Maybe she should sit on the couch and pretend to be reading a book. Or maybe she should casually come down from upstairs as if to say, "Oh, Catherine, you're home, I was just sleeping." But no. She wasn't doing any of those things when she heard someone coming up the front steps. She was sitting on the stairs in the hallway, a half an inch from hyperventilating and only half an inch more from death by palpitations.

That's when she heard it. The knock. A knock? Maybe it wasn't Catherine? There was a Catherine-shaped silhouette in fogged glass window, but why would Catherine knock? Getting to her feet, Sara took two steps and opened the door. It was definitely Catherine. She gave a questioning look and Catherine shrugged her reply. _Okay, relax. Be cool. Say something…normal._ "How was your flight?" _Good job._

Another shrug. "Boring. Uneventful. Pretzels instead of peanuts- bonus." Catherine gave an awkward smile.

Sara gave a weak one in return. "Let me grab your bag." She reached for the suitcase and made room for Catherine to move past her. "Was the cab really expensive?"

"Forty bucks. They're doing that flat fee thing now."Catherine looked around the living room. Sara had obviously cleaned and done a better job than she had ever done herself. Had she polished the wood furniture? Everything was shining and she could smell the cleaning chemicals. When she turned back to Sara, she could tell she was waiting for a reply. "Sorry, what'd you say?"

"I said, 'I could have come to get you and saved you the money."

"It was fine. I needed the time to, uh, think about…things."

Sara nodded her understanding. "You want me to fix us some coffee?"

Catherine shook her head, "I had enough on the plane to last me a while. Besides, its my house; I should make the coffee."

"You just got back. You should relax."

"Sounds good to me." Kicking off her shoes, Catherine moved to the sofa and sank down with a grateful sigh.

Sara waited in the doorway. Even with the early morning wake-up call, Catherine still managed to look like a beautiful spring day. Her hair was all fanned out over the cushions and her eyes were closed. How did she manage to look so calm at a moment like this?

"Get in here, Sidle, quit lollygagging." To tell the truth, Catherine was anything but calm. But she'd be damned if anybody ever caught on. Besides, closing her eyes gave her a few more seconds to pretend she didn't have to talk about this. That it wasn't really happening. She heard a rustle of fabric as Sara dropped into the loveseat across from her. It was strange. Sara had never hesitated to sit next to her before. She understood why it was happening now, but it made her uncomfortable? Sad? Anxious? She'd gotten used to the closeness they shared and it felt wrong to have this conversation with a coffee table between them. Still with her eyes closed, she intoned, "Sara. Come sit by me." She tried to make her voice calm and reassuring. Had she succeeded?

Mostly. Sara stood and moved to sit at the far end of the couch, tailor style. This had to be a good sign, didn't it? Catherine wouldn't want her so close if she were horrified or disgusted by her proclamation four days ago. She was about to find out. Seemingly unhurriedly, Catherine sat up, moved until she was just a few inches away, folded her legs beneath her, and looked up into Sara's eyes.

She met Sara's gaze for a long time, trying to figure out the best course of action. To Sara's credit, she did not look away. The seconds ticked by slowly, painfully. Catherine's heartbeat was fast; Sara's was faster. Finally, Catherine came to a decision and held out her hand. Sara glanced down at it and then back into blue eyes, unsure. Catherine quirked an eyebrow, and Sara acquiesced, placing her hand into the other woman's open palm. Catherine pulled their joined hands into her lap.

"Now," she breathed, "Say it again."

Sara blinked. _Say what?_ "Say…"

Catherine gave her a meaningful expression.

Oh. _Oh. _Sara tried to pull her hand back but Catherine wouldn't have it. She looked away. "I…uh…I…uh…"

"Sara." Catherine refocused her attention. "Do you know who confesses their love over the telephone? Chicken-shits and teenagers. Do you know who takes their word for it?"

"Umm…other chicken-shits and teenagers?" she spoke softly.

"Right. And we are…" Catherine prompted.

"Not…teenagers?" Sara asked hopefully.

Catherine lightly smacked the top of her hand. "Or chicken-shits, Sara! We are grown women. And you are one of the bravest people I know." She leveled her gaze. "So. Take a deep breath, and say it…again." She squeezed the hand in hers.

Sara took a deep breath. And another. And another. "Okay, umm…" She tried to find the words. It had been so easy when there had been a thousand miles between them, but now that she had a captive audience, she was petrified. "Can I just be a chicken-shit for a while longer?" she whined. _That didn't come out right._

Catherine dropped her hand with a frown. "No, Sara. You can't. You opened this can of worms and until I figure out what I'm going to do about it, you are going to play by my rules. Now say it…again."

Sara leaned back. "Why? I already said it, it hasn't changed, you obviously haven't forgotten I said it, can't you just put me out of my misery?"

Catherine moved back as well. "Can't you just put me out of _mine_?" she raised her voice. "Sara, I was sitting in a cab, minding my own business, when you forced this on me. You've had _months _to think about it and I've had four _days_! This situation in no way compromises your idea of your lifestyle or sexuality, in no way compromises your family, in no way compromises your _life, _so-"

Sara jumped to her feet. "Doesn't compromise my life?" she shouted. "You are my best friend- practically my _only_ friend. We work together, we relax together, we confide in each other. What do you think my life is without you, and this doesn't compromise my _life?_ You _are _my life, Catherine!"

Catherine was standing too, "Then fucking say it again, Sara! I need to hear you say it, I need to see your face, I need to see you mean it and its not some casual thing, okay?"

"Mean it? Why would I say it if I didn't mean it?"

"Why would anyone say it if they didn't mean it, Sara? But its been said to me a thousand times, and I've yet to hear somebody fucking mean it. And if you are just one more person on that fucking list, then I am going kick you out that fucking door and never talk to you again!" She gasped for air. "Say. It. Again."

Sara was breathing raggedly. She was staring into Catherine's face and gritting her teeth.

"I love you," she ground out. She moved closer. One step. Two. "I love you," she repeated, stepping closer still. "I love you," she was a foot away.

Catherine stepped back and sank into the corner of the sofa, trembling and unable to drop her gaze. Sara followed, leaning over until her face hovered just above Catherine's.

"I love you," she whispered, never looking away.

"Why?" it was Catherine's turn to whine.

Sara leaned forward just an inch. And kissed her. Softly. Sweetly. Once. Twice. And pulled back that same inch. "You're…everything I've ever wanted." She moved to sit by the other woman's side, taking her hand and leaning in close. Catherine wasn't rejecting her advances yet and she took advantage. She brushed her nose against a pale cheek and then kissed it gently, not moving away. "You're strong and fearless and independent," she murmured. "You're challenging and fierce and brave. You're a relentless, wild, whirlwind of a woman. And I'll never get tired of you. Not your frustrated sighs or your angry rants. Not your stubborn insistence on always having the last word."

Catherine had closed her eyes long ago and couldn't help leaning closer. "But…those are the worst things about me."

Sara wrapped her arms around the smaller woman, breathed into her hairline and kissed her forehead. "No," she protested, "Those are the _best_ things about you. Anyone can be funny and charming and silly and sweet. Anyone can be another pretty face. You _are _all of those things. A stunning, beautiful woman with an air of mystery and intoxication, but that's just…icing on the cake. I love _all _of you. Not just the 'you' you want people to see." She held Catherine tight, praying that this wouldn't be the last time she was in her arms, praying she wasn't about to get pushed away.

Catherine turned her head up and nuzzled the bridge of her nose into the crook of Sara's neck, content to revel in the moment. _Damn, _she thought, _that was sure as Hell the best 'I love you' I've ever heard. Maybe anyone's ever heard. Geez, I'm such an…_she stopped. She opened her eyes. She pulled away from the warm embrace, sat up and stared at she ceiling. "Jesus." She looked at Sara who was looking suddenly unsure of herself. She beamed broadly. "I'm an idiot, you know that, Sidle?"

"Umm…no…?"

Catherine pounced forward so enthusiastically, she knocked Sara back and landed on top of her. She was still grinning. "Well, I am!" She touched her nose gently to the brunette's, and then burrowed in to the woman's side, her head on Sara's shoulder and an arm across her middle. She squeezed tight and sighed. "This…is going to take some getting used to."

"This?" Sara asked, definitely not complaining if 'this' got her more of _this_ treatment.

"You. Loving me. Me. Getting crazier about you by the second." Catherine tried to snuggle in closer and was dismayed to find she was already as close as she could get. She groaned her frustration.

Sara could guess her motives; it wasn't close enough for her either. "Here," she mumbled. She turned on her side until they were a tangle of arms and legs and tumbling hair, holding on for dear life with no space between them. "I've got you."

Shyly, Catherine turned her face up and pressed her lips to Sara's neck. "You do, don't you?" she murmured

Sara kissed her brow. "Always."

Catherine hummed and closed her eyes. "Did you sleep at all?"

"Are you kidding? How could I? I've never been so petrified in my life."

Catherine smiled lazily, gripping Sara's back tightly. "Me either. Lets just lie here for a while. We'll figure out what to tell Lindsey in a couple hours."

"Hmm. 'Kay."

"Sar?"

"Hmm?"

"Say it again."

"I love you, Cath. I love you."

"And you'll still love me when we wake up?"

"I told you, Cath. Always."

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

**Well? What did you think?! Did you love it? I did! And you should all review and tell me if you want an epilogue chapter! **


	6. Chapter 6

01/06/2014

**A/N: Hey guys! So enough of you guys said you wanted an epilogue chapter, and I happen to agree because so much of this is about them as a family and we barely heard from Lindsey at all last chapter so voila! Here you go!**

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

"Okay. Okay, okay, okay. I heard her. She's up. Okay. This is it. Don't panic. It's going to be okay." Catherine tightened her grip on the phone against her ear. "This _is _going to be okay, isn't it?"

If Sara hadn't been so nervous herself, she might have chuckled at the uneasy tone of Catherine's voice. "Uh, yeah. It is. Its going to be fine. Better than fine. Its going to be great."

"Could you sound a little more sure of yourself, please?" The redhead sounded positively harassed.

Sara took a deep breath as she turned into the residential neighborhood. "Yes," she said more confidently. "This will all work out. You'll see. It will be totally fine." When she didn't hear anything on the other end of the line, she continued, "Cath? Get off the phone, go tell Lindsey the plan, and get her dressed. I will be there in two minutes."  
>Catherine shook herself. "Right. Right. See you in a sec."She hung up the phone and allowed herself a few seconds of leaning her head against the closed door to think about what she was about to do.<p>

It had been three weeks since _that _day. The day Sara had confessed her love- properly this time. The day Catherine had realized that Sara had been the one she'd been looking for all her life. The day they had agreed that they would wait to tell Lindsey about their newfound relationship until they had figured out how things were going to work between them as a couple and as a family. So far, all Lindsey knew was that Sara and her mom had made up and were definitely no longer fighting.

She had dragged her feet to her mother's van that day after school, looking dismayed, for all it was the first day of summer vacation. And when she saw that Sara was not in the car, she was downright forlorn.

"Hey, baby," her mother smiled and kissed her cheek.

"Hi," Lindsey drew out, sounding very much like Eeyore.

"Aren't you happy to see me?" Her mom smiled even wider, though it was obvious her daughter was upset.

"Yeah…" Lindsey said, close to tears.

"What about me?" Sara popped her head out of the way back, grinning broadly.

In the blink of an eye, Lindsey lit up like a Christmas tree, looking wonderingly between the two women. "You mean…?"

Catherine nodded, beaming and immediately received a lapful of happy kid. Sara struggled up to the front and received an ardent hug of her own. "Oof. Missed you today, kiddo."

"Missed you too," came the teary reply.

"Buckle up, we thought it was a day to celebrate. Where do you want to go?"

"To get my belly button pierced?!"

"Nice try! How about…the wave pool at Mandalay Bay?"

"Yes!"

So for Lindsey, the next week had consisted of as many fun times as Catherine and Sara could fit into their busy schedule. After that, she had gone off to soccer camp, and the women had gotten two glorious weeks to themselves. Despite the heat, and consequently the crime rate, spiking, they had had quite a bit of time together. They'd been to dinner a few times and been dancing once, they had even gone miniature golfing, much to Sara's horror and Catherine's amusement. They had also had a lot of long talks, many nights of deep sleep in each other's arms, and a few more…intimate liaisons.

Not sex- not yet, though the prospect certainly made Catherine's heart beat a little faster. But she felt herself increasingly at ease with being physical with Sara, the snuggling and kissing certainly came easily enough, and the other day at the movies, it was she that had sought out Sara's hand and gripped it tight. The fumbling and heated embraces were growing ever more exciting too, and she knew it wouldn't be long until she could resist no more. And Sara was so…gentle. _I mean, its not like she's not passionate,_ Catherine thought, blushing a little, _I know she wants me._ But Sara was patient and loving and more than willing to wait. It was the longest Catherine had waited to have sex since she was sixteen, but in the end, she just wasn't ready.

That being said, she knew this thing with Sara was going to last. She could feel it. Sara was…perfect. Just as she had before they had gotten together, Sara was there for her. She made her laugh- accidentally and on purpose, with her cuteness and awkwardness and weirdly weird jokes. She warmed her heart with acts of kindness and bravery- at work as well as at home. She was comfortable and easy to be around but was never ever boring. Most of all, Sara truly did seem to love the things about her that were normally what drove others away. She would let Catherine scream and vent, in front of her as well as at her. When it was needed, she would sit and listen, and when it was needed, she would scream right back. Afterward, she would take Catherine in her arms and they would calm down together. In all, it was the best relationship Catherine had ever had, even if it was brand new. This was it. She knew it.

Which was why, last night, after Lindsey had gotten home from camp and was all tucked into bed, Catherine had called Sara and told her she couldn't wait any longer, they had to tell Lindsey in the morning. Now though, Catherine tried to remember all of the reasons this couldn't wait. She didn't want to hide this from her daughter. She didn't want the stress of sneaking around. She wanted to be happy and she wanted the whole world to know it. Especially Lindsey- Lindsey should be the first to know. Right. So. Catherine stood up straight and opened the door, only to find her daughter in the hall, heading toward the bathroom.

"Morning, baby."

Lindsey yawned. "Morning, Mom. Why you dressed? S'only nine o'clock on Sunday."

Catherine smiled tensely. "Well, Sara is coming by to pick us up in just a few minutes to take us out for pancakes!"

The little blonde perked up a bit. "Really?"

As if on command, the doorbell rang.

Catherine lit up with both nerves and pleasure. "Really, really. Hurry up and get dressed, I'll get the door."

"'Kay. Gotta pee first." Lindsey continued her walk to the bathroom as Catherine trotted down the stairs.

She swung the door open and met the eyes of the woman on the other side. "Good morning," she grinned.

Sara cocked an eyebrow, "Good morning," she husked.

Catherine looked over her shoulder, stepped outside, and closed the door behind her. Then she wrapped her arms around Sara's neck, pushed up on her tip toes, and kissed her sweetly. "How was work?"

Sara put her arms around the smaller woman's waist and pecked her lips again. "Not bad. I was still on the Walton case with Warrick. Nick pulled a nasty trick roll though. Guy was into some freaky stuff apparently."

Catherine laughed, kissed her girlfriend one more time, and pulled out of the embrace.

"All was pretty quiet around here. I'm pulling my double tonight? So I stayed up watching reruns of West Wing and Lindsey slept like a baby. I think camp tuckered her out. Up for a snuggle fest this afternoon? I need plenty of sleep in time for shift." Catherine moved to let them into the house.

"Oh sure. I'll stay with you for few hours and then dinner for the munchkin."

Once they were inside, Catherine turned back to Sara. In a low voice she said, "This is going to be okay, right?"

Sara shifted uneasily. "Yeah, you know, I'm sure it will be fine."

Catherine nodded quietly.

"Uh, Cath?"

She looked up.

"If she…doesn't take it well. Are you going to…? Are we going to…?" Sara regrouped. "Is this over?"

Catherine took a deep breath. "No." More sure of herself, she repeated, "No. She'll just have to…get used to it. That's all. This is what I want. You are…what I want." She smiled up into the brunette's face. "And you're good for her too. If she gets upset, we'll just have to keep talking it out until she accepts it. Okay?"

Sara breathed a sigh of relief. "Yeah. Okay."

They stared at each other for a few moments longer until they heard a clatter on the stairs.

"Sara? Sara, I'm coming!"

Lindsey sped past her mom and collided with Sara with an 'oof.'

"Hey, kiddo! How was camp?"

Lindsey grabbed her by the hand and towed her toward the door. "Pancakes, pancakes, pancakes!"

Sara laughed and pulled her back. "Easy, tiger. Slow down." She grabbed the girl's shoulders and turned her to face her. "Good morning," she said with deliberate slowness. "Its good to see you. How was camp?"

"Great, great, great. We learned about misdirection and some trick plays and played so much soccer I'm gonna die!"

Sara smiled and looked at Catherine fondly. "Good. Now, would anyone be interested in some pancakes?"

Lindsey leapt about three feet in the air. "Yes! Me!"

"And you, Ms. Willows?"

Catherine gave a flirty eyebrow quirk. "Why yes, I do believe I would."

"Good," said Lindsey. "Great. Let's go!"

Lindsey grabbed Sara's hand, Sara grabbed Catherine's hand, and they were out the door.

It was all Sara could do not to grab Catherine's hand again on the ride to the diner, as she had grown used to doing over the past two weeks. Catherine was having the same problem and found herself picking at the hem of her shorts and fiddling with the air conditioning just to keep her hands busy. Finally Sara compromised and put her arm around the back of Catherine's seat, her fingertips just resting on the other woman's shoulder. Catherine smiled gratefully at her as they stopped at a light and Sara smiled knowingly back. Sex or no, she could not keep her hands off this woman.

"So, Linds," she asked as a way of distracting herself, "Did you make any new friends at camp?"

Lindsey regaled them with camp anecdotes until they arrived in the parking lot and then raced ahead of them to secure a booth inside the restaurant. They exchanged a last nervous look and followed her in. Unfortunately, the diner was a popular place on Sunday morning and they had to wait a few minutes to get a table. Once they were seated and had looked over the menu, an awkward silence fell over the table. As the quiet drew out, Lindsey looked back and forth between her mother and Sara.

"Okay, what gives? You guys are being, like, really weird."

"What do you mean?"

Lindsey rolled her eyes. "You're all weird and stuff," she said by way of explanation. "You keep looking at each other and not talking and in the car you were totally not listening to my stuff about camp, _and_ Sara _always_ sits next to me when we go out to eat and today she's sitting next to you. Weird."

Catherine shifted uneasily and looked to Sara for help.

"See?!" Lindsey said exasperatedly, "You're doing it again. Am I dying or something?"

"No, you're not dying. The thing is, Linds-"

But at that moment a waiter came by to take their order. After they had placed it and the menus had been collected, Lindsey looked expectantly at them to continue.

Sara put a hand on Catherine's thigh under the table and went on. "Remember before you left for camp, your mom and I had a big fight?" Sara belatedly realized she was going in blind on this one. They hadn't actually talked about how they were going to tell her.

Lindsey rolled her eyes again. "Duh. It totally sucked."

"Right. So…" an idea occurred to her, "Do you remember how I told you that the reason Matt Lichtenstein picked arguments with you in social studies class was because he probably had a crush on you?"

Catherine snorted and wrapped her hand around the one on her thigh encouragingly.

"Uh-huh." Lindsey looked back and forth between the adults, suspicious about this apparent subject change.

"Well," Sara plowed ahead, "the reason I picked a big fight with your mom was because…I'm," now this sounded completely stupid, "in love with her…" she finished awkwardly.

Lindsey's jaw hit the floor. "Uh…_what?!"_

"Yeah," Sara rushed, "and the reason I was so upset was because I was sure she would never like me back, but after you got sick, we had a really long talk and I found out that she…felt the same way."

Lindsey stared at her mother, "_What?!" _she squeaked.

Sara kept going, in a hurry to get this over with now. "Right, so while you were at camp, we…talked about it some more, and decided we should start…dating. So…we are."

"_Each other?" _Lindsey shrieked incredulously. People at the booth behind her turned briefly to see what the fuss was about.

Catherine finally spoke up in a harsh whisper, "Lindsey, keep your voice down!"

"Mom!" the blonde admonished, "I'm kinda freaking out here, right now! I think I can be a little bit loud if I want to!" She looked between them again. "Oh my God, oh my god." She stared for another moment. "Oh my God."

There was a drawn out silence when no one said anything for a long minute.

"Mom, you're not even a lesbian!" Was the next thing Lindsey came out with, just a little too loudly. More than one table looked around at that.

"Lindsey!" Catherine blushed furiously.

Lindsey had the good graces to look slightly embarrassed. "Sorry," she said in a more normal voice. "But you're not. I asked you if you ever had a crush on a girl, like, ages and ages ago and you said- you _said_ that it was okay if I ever did, but you just don't feel that way. You _said_ that."

Catherine paused a second to think before answering. "You're right. I did say that. And at the time, it was true. And generally, I'm still not…attracted," Lindsey made a face as if the idea of her mother being _attracted_ to anybody was just plain wrong, "to women in general. But," Catherine met Sara's eyes and smiled, "Sara is different. She's an exception. I…She's…amazing. And," she shrugged, "if her being a woman was the only reason why I didn't want to date her, then I decided that wasn't much of a reason at all. Its just like I taught you. It doesn't matter who you…love, as long as they make you happy. Right?"

Lindsey bonked her head on the table and sighed, "Right." She drew out the word before looking up. "So, does this mean you guys are going to, like, kiss and stuff now?" She scrunched her nose.

Sara a looked at her girlfriend and grinned. "Yes. It does. Every day. But we will try to keep the making out to a minimum when you're around."

Lindsey had a terrified expression on her face, "Oh, gross! No, you guys cannot do that! No one wants to see that! You are too old to do that!"

"Linds," Catherine said gently, smiling peacefully, "Its very important for people who are in a relationship to…be able to show it and be comfortable with it. Besides, wouldn't you rather have parents who love each other and are affectionate than parents who hate each other or fight all the time?"

Right then, the food arrived and they waited for it to be put in front of them before they continued talking. For her part, Lindsey looked a bit dumbfounded.

"Parents?" she asked, finally. "Like…" she looked at Sara, "Like two? Like two parents? Like…" she looked down at her pancakes, and said quietly, "Like a family." It wasn't a question. "Like a real family." It was almost a whisper, said more to herself than to anyone else.

Catherine gripped Sara's hand tightly, her heart breaking as she watched her daughter struggle with such big emotions. For her part, Sara was also more than a little dumbfounded. She hadn't expected Catherine to make the 'parents' comment. The word had flowed so easily off her tongue too. And even though they had discussed it and she had hoped Lindsey would accept her as a parent somewhere down the line, she hadn't thought it would come up so soon. As she watched Lindsey, who looked so much like a little girl right now and not like her big thirteen year-old self, she felt a new mantle settle over her. A new responsibility. She was a parent. When she saw Lindsey's shoulders start give little heaves and shakes, she quickly released Catherine's hand and slid out of one side of the booth and into the other.

"Hey, honey, it's okay. It's okay. Please, please don't cry." Hesitantly, she dropped a hand onto the girl's back and was startled when Lindsey turned and buried her face in her chest and began to cry in earnest. "Oh, okay," Sara wrapped her arms around her, "okay, it's okay, you can cry if you want." She stroked the girl's hair and kissed the top of her head. "You're okay. I've got you." She looked across the table and saw that Catherine was wiping away tears too. At the same time, the redhead gave her an encouraging smile to let her know she was alright. It took some minutes for Lindsey to calm down, during which time their waiter came by to see if she was alright.

"She's fine," Sara assured him. "I think," she looked down at her charge, "I think she's just really happy." The waiter gave her an odd look, but nodded and continued on his rounds. After her crying had eased to sniffles and then deep breaths, Sara kissed Lindsey's head one more time and pulled away. "You okay, kiddo?"

Lindsey wiped at her eyes and nodded. "Sorry. I guess that was really," she hiccupped, "really embarrassing, huh?" She hiccupped again.

Catherine pushed a glass of water at her. "No, honey. It wasn't embarrassing. We just gave you some really hard news. I realize now we should have told you at home where you could freak out a little more, I'm sorry. It seemed like a good idea at the time."

Lindsey took a big gulp from the cup and then stared down at her plate. "I think I cried on my pancakes."

Sara continued rubbing her back, "Is it too much to stay here, kiddo? We can take this stuff home if you want."

Lindsey looked at her incredulously. "Eww. No! Have you ever had microwaved pancakes? Gross." She picked up her fork then hesitated, "But maybe after we're done, we could go home and have a quiet day. You know…" she paused, "do family stuff?" She looked hopefully from her mother to Sara. What? Her new mother?

Sara smiled and gave her a huge hug and a kiss. Then she pulled her plate over from across the table and took up a fork of her own. "That sounds fantastic, kiddo." She winked at Catherine who beamed right back. "That sounds absolutely fantastic."

**CSICSIILOVECSI!**

**And there you have it folks, all finished with a shiny bow on top. What did you think? Say you loved it! Really loved it. It sure made me smile. Please, please review! It makes me soooo very happy!**


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